So I totally watched Memoirs of a Geisha, and half of the film was about the girl (Zhang Ziyi) waiting to have her virginity auctioned off so she can become a "proper geisha". This was Japan in the 20th century, I believe.
Alas, for those of you who don't know, virginities are auctioned off even now. And now there's going to be a whole documentary about it! It will be directed by a relatively unknown Australian director named Justin Sisely, who is now facing criticism from the Australian government. One politician called the project “absurd, ridiculous and disgusting.”
To spice things up, the documentary will include both a male and a female virgin (I was quite surprised by this, since I know women's virginities are generally considered more "worthy than men's is - and you will see why later): a 20-year-old woman named Catarina Migliorini from Brazil and 23-year-old Alex Stepanov from Russia.
Both candidates have agreed to have their "journey" filmed - all the way until the actual consummation. To avoid prostitution laws, the fornication will happen on an airplane.
As Migliorini says: "The winner will be entitled to at least an hour with me. He cannot act out fantasies, use sex toys, nothing. It is also mandatory to use a condom and can only take my virginity, nothing more. He can talk. But no kissing."
On October 24th, 2012, Migliorini's virginity was sold to man (presumably) named Natsu. Sounds like a Japanese name. Also is this just a coincidence that this man happens to be Japanese, and Memoirs of a Geisha was based in Japan. Remind me to look into the value of virginity in Japan. Anyway, he has offered a $780,000. Ah, the price of making love. Stepanov, on the other hand, received a winning bid of $3,000.
Here are the two uncomfortable notions I have with this story: first, Migliorini has expressed interest in donating her money to charities in Brazil. However, charities may refuse the money because it might "set a dangerous precedent." Second, why was Migliorini's virginity worth so much more than Stepanov.
I am conflicted on the first point. On one hand, I think Migliorini's intentions are great. On the other hand, I see the arguments that charities can make - technically, they are allowed to refuse money from people. They can refuse money from terrorists, from bribers, from political affiliations. But should they? Does it matter where money comes from, as long as the money goes somewhere good? Money is money, so are people allowed to be picky as to whom they're receiving the money from?
On the second point, I am deeply concerned with the disparity between the value of a man's and a woman's virginity. For anyone who has seen or read the Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti, you'll see how in some societies, the value of a woman's virginity overshadows that woman's personality or character. Take purity balls, purity rings, purity t-shirts, purity statements - we are a country that takes a woman's virginity way too seriously. That's why we have celebrities like Jessica Simpson, Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus amongst the few, proudly claiming or having proclaimed that they are virgins and waiting to be married.
Last time I checked, I only cared whether you were a good singer or not, not if you were sleeping around with other people. But somehow they feel the need to answer or proudly exclaim it, which makes me wonder: do we associate virginity with whether they are "good" people or not? Why is being a virgin something women feel the need to share? Do we have as many men come out and shout out he's a virgin? I don't think so.
If we want to treat men and women equally, we need to treat their virginities equally as well. Women are not "tainted" or "damaged goods" if they sleep with men. They do not "lose all their petals" and become worthless. Migliorini's virginity should not be worth so much more than Stepanov just because she is a woman (I checked the website; he is not unattractive either, so I ruled out that as a possibility as to why his bids were much lower).
But whether or not hers is higher, I am still uncomfortable with the idea that virginities could be bought or sold. I'm thinking maybe we could think of it in terms of service, like giving massages. I'm not really sure how I think about this.
I was just talking to my friend about this the other day. At our age, if a girl is still a virgin, people will think that she is waiting until marriage or hasn't found someone special yet. If a guy at our age is still a virgin, we think that he just hasn't "manned up" or that maybe he is gay. It just further proves how much of a double standard guys get in the virginity department.
ReplyDeleteI agree with what Madison said. I think theres some sort of notion that the guy should always be more experienced. The American culture puromotes the idea that sensitive females want or even need a special first time with a man they love. If they give up their virginity to "just anyone" they are viewed as a "slut" or "whore". We also promote a culture where men are encouraged to sleep with many women but if girls do they are looked down upon. I wonder if these type of sexual identities are the same throughout the world? Are their countries where less importance or emphasis is placed on a girls "first time"? In my opinion it seems that people in the US are less concerned that boy make sure there first time is "special" or with someone they truly love. I think a large part of this difference stems from the fact that women can get pregnant, but boy can contract disease and father a child as well and possibly have to pay child support or assume other responsibilities as a result. There is even a sharp contrast in the way parents treat female and male children-- what age they are allowed to date, where they're allowed to go by themselves, if they are allowed to have the door closed with someone of the opposite sex in the room etc... I think it would be interesting to explore these concepts further.
ReplyDelete